Chemainus woman ‘Rose’ knows she’s fortunate she got her $1,500 returned from a man she met on a dating site. She balked at requests to give him any additional money. (Photo by Don Bodger)

Chemainus woman ‘Rose’ knows she’s fortunate she got her $1,500 returned from a man she met on a dating site. She balked at requests to give him any additional money. (Photo by Don Bodger)

Island woman warns of scams on dating sites from personal experience

Rose gets her $1,500 back, but most aren’t as fortunate

A Chemainus woman who fell for a scam from a man on a dating site is cautioning others about responding too willingly to requests for money no matter what the circumstances.

‘Rose’ (not her real name) considers herself among the fortunate few who actually got $1,500 back that she sent to a person she’d never met. She knows women have lost far more than that to men who professed their love for them and then asked for cash to compensate for a predicament they encountered, a supposed worthwhile investment, a fundraising venture or some other reason that may have initially sounded believable.

It can work both ways, but men are more likely to be the predators.

Rose is a widow and “after five years of being on my own, I was getting pretty lonely,” she conceded.

Rose suffered from depression following the death of her husband and a friend had been on a dating site that planted the idea in her mind.

“I got to thinking, I can’t go through this life, this journey on my own,” she said. “I’m a people person.

“Maybe I should go on an on-line dating site. To that point, I hadn’t thought about it.”

She went on a couple of sites and received quite a few responses on one of them. One man who corresponded with her starting in late September mentioned he had a contract to maintain a shelter/orphanage in Iraq where kids had gone through hell with festering wounds and a terrible way of life. When the shelter was built, some of them had to undergo rehabilitation.

Having adopted daughters of her own, six grandchildren and a seventh on the way, the story of the kids’ struggles there tore at her heartstrings.

“At that point, he asked me for a donation,” Rose said.

“Of course, I’ll make a donation,” she remembers responding. “It hits you like an arrow. I want to help those kids.”

The man later said he wanted Rose to meet him at the Vancouver airport, telling her he’s an orphan, had no family and was already falling in love with her.

He said he was going to make millions on another project in Germany and wanted to buy her a car, a house and go travelling with her.

“I’m flattered because somebody’s paying attention to me,” Rose reasoned. “I fell for this guy.”

He was emailing her almost every day but frequent phone calls that came from a California area code didn’t sit well with Rose.

“I started questioning everything,” she noted.

He explained the California number stemmed from a good deal he received on a phone plan, but Rose discovered he was actually in Ontario.

Alarm bells really went off for her when he made another request for money, this time for $9,000.

“I said, ‘no, I’ve got children, I’ve got grandchildren.’

“He bugged me about that money. I said, ‘no, we’re not in a relationship. I haven’t even met you yet.’”

The man said he was going to Germany, carrying on about some oil drilling project and continued to pester her about the $9,000.

“I decided I had enough,” said Rose.

Interestingly, she went to have her Tarot cards read by Andrea Dolgos Shurvell at the Chemainus Public Market. She turned over Finance, Life and Health cards.

All the cards, she felt, turned up significant details on what was happening.

“The one thing that really clinched it all, she said your husband is here, he’s got his hand on your shoulder,” said Rose.

She broke free from the man’s spells and got inspired by the Tarot card reader to stay for a few days in Victoria on a bit of a sabbatical, the first time she’d driven the Malahat by herself.

Rose purchased a Tree of Life pendant in Victoria that she considers symbolic in her second chance at life following her previous bouts with depression.

The man kept writing Rose poetry on emails and leaving phone messages.

She started to investigate where her $1,500 had gone through the Canadian Imperial Bank of Commerce and reported the incident to the North Cowichan/Duncan RCMP, but didn’t expect to get anywhere with it.

Remarkably, a man in the fraud department at CIBC’s head office in Toronto did track down the transaction to a bank account of a woman in North York, Ont. He said there was a good chance she’d get her money back and pointed out that last year in Canada people had been scammed out of more than $37 million.

“My little $1,500 looks like a drop in the bucket,” Rose conceded.

The woman denied being part of any scheme and said her brother – who claimed to be an orphan to Rose – got her into it. Faced with possible arrest if she didn’t return the money to Rose’s account, the woman complied.

Rose had her money back and became all the wiser for the experience.

“Be wary,” she advised. “I gave the money in good faith believing it was going to a children’s charity in Iraq.”

Rose quickly paid her good fortune forward and donated the money to a local cause.

CommunityScams

Get local stories you won't find anywhere else right to your inbox.
Sign up here

 

A Tree of Life pendant ‘Rose’ purchased in Victoria is a gift to herself for eluding further requests to send money to a man she met on a dating site. (Photo by Don Bodger)

A Tree of Life pendant ‘Rose’ purchased in Victoria is a gift to herself for eluding further requests to send money to a man she met on a dating site. (Photo by Don Bodger)

Just Posted

Nanaimo RCMP seek help in locating Shannon Lettington, 35. (Submitted photo)
Nanaimo RCMP searching for missing 35-year-old woman

Shannon Lettington, of Nanaimo, has not contacted her family since October

This month Christy Blom’s Springtime show is on display at Art 10 Gallery. (Photo submitted)
Nanaimo painter welcomes spring with watercolour exhibition

Christy Blom presents month-long ‘Springtime’ show at Art 10 Gallery

Lucas Philp, senior fish culturist at Vancouver Island Trout Hatchery, packs up pipes and hoses used to transfer trout from the transport truck into lakes, shortly after releasing about 500 rainbow trout into Colliery Dam No. 3 lake Wednesday. (Chris Bush/News Bulletin)
There are fresh fish to catch in Nanaimo’s lakes

Vancouver Island Trout Hatchery released thousands of catchable-size rainbow trout this week

Protesters march on Nanaimo’s Commercial Street last September, calling for greater protection of B.C.’s old-growth forests. (News Bulletin file photo)
LETTER TO THE EDITOR: More old growth needs protecting

Public support for protecting old-growth forests is evident, says letter writer

The shadow cast of the Satyr Players production of ‘The Rocky Horror Picture Show’: Linda Dohmeier as Dr. Scott, Olivia Erickson as Columbia, Brandon Caul as Rocky, Christopher Carter as Brad, Charlie Prince as Eddie, Branden Martell as Riff Raff, Jenna Morgan as Magenta, Megan Rhode as Janet and Adrien Kennedy as Dr. Frank-N-Furter (clockwise from left). (Josef Jacobson/The News Bulletin)
VIU student actors go online for 25th-annual ‘Rocky Horror Picture Show’

Satyr Players theatre company to broadcast pre-recorded shadow production

B.C. Health Minister Adrian Dix and provincial health officer Dr. Bonnie Henry head for the B.C. legislature press theatre to give a daily update on the COVID-19 pandemic, April 6, 2020. (B.C. government)
B.C. nears 300,000 COVID-19 vaccinations, essential workers next

564 new cases, four deaths, no new outbreaks Thursday

Beef to the plow driver who completely soaked me in dirty slush at the bus stop at Fifth and Hillcrest. I could tell you were driving quite fast so I tried to back up as far as the snowbank would allow but you did not slow down. I am 68 and had to pick up a prescription and had no choice but to continue on soaking wet.
Beefs & Bouquets, March 3

To submit a beef or a bouquet to the Nanaimo News Bulletin, e-mail editor@nanaimobulletin.com

Municipal Affairs Minister Josie Osborne speaks in the B.C. legislature, March 4, 2021. (Hansard TV)
B.C. Liberals, NDP sing in harmony on local election reforms

Bill regulates paid canvassers, allows people in condo buildings

The intersection of Melrose Street and Third Avenue. (ELENA RARDON / ALBERNI VALLEY NEWS)
Suspect in custody after two pedestrians struck in Port Alberni hit and run

RCMP asking for video footage, credit witnesses for quick arrest

(National Emergency Management Agency)
No tsunami risk to B.C. from powerful New Zealand earthquake: officials

An 8.1 magnitude earthquake shook the north of New Zealand Thursday morning

Comox Valley RCMP had access to 20 Street blocked off between Cousins and Choquette avenues as they conducted a raid of a house on the block. Photo by Terry Farrell
Comox Valley RCMP raid Courtenay problem house, several arrests made

Comox Valley RCMP conducted a raid of a problem house on 20th… Continue reading

(AP Photo/Richard Vogel, File)
Pandemic stress, isolation key factors as to why Canadians turned to cannabis, alcohol

Study found that isolation played key role in Canadians’ substance use

Jobs Minister Ravi Kahlon speaks in the B.C. legislature, describing work underway to make a small business and tourism aid package less restrictive, Dec. 10, 2020. (Hansard TV)
B.C. extends deadline for tourism, small business COVID-19 grants

Business owners expect months more of lost revenues

Most Read