Beef to the guy who said I was the type to take on road trips and not build a life with.

Beef to the guy who said I was the type to take on road trips and not build a life with.

Beefs & Bouquets, June 23

To submit a beef or a bouquet to the Nanaimo News Bulletin, e-mail editor@nanaimobulletin.com

BOUQUET To the War Amps key tag service. Although I haven’t kept up my membership for several years, they contacted me because the person who found my keys called them. I’m going to renew my membership; it’s a great cause.

BEEF To all of the cyclists on the E&N and other trails who can’t see well enough to notice pedestrians. They also seem to have missing fingers and/or thumbs so they can’t use their bells to announce they are passing. Purchasers of electric bikes seem to share the same challenges; they deserve credit for their amazing ability to cycle while barely missing the pedestrians who can’t hear/see them coming up from behind.

BOUQUET To the team of young people and their adult supervisors who chopped out broom (gorse) bushes along Jenkins Road. Beef to those who have this alien weed in their gardens.

BEEF I wish we could vote for judges and prosecutors, then maybe sentences would be firmer than a slap on the hand. The Schoolhouse Squat is now costing the taxpayers?

BOUQUET To Nanaimo city councils since 2005. You have taken 16 years of analysis paralysis to go from a study of how to obtain funding to possibly rejecting a proposal to build a $3.2-million boathouse that may or may not have a politically correct roof. It is apparent that political science students couldn’t have a better real-life example of analysis paralysis than this one.

BEEF To the people ignoring the Scotch broom in their yard and on the boulevard and roadside. The time to remove it is now when it is filled with yellow blossoms. Scotch broom is an alien invasive plant crowding out our native plants. It is highly flammable, spreads rapidly and is toxic to wildlife. Let’s work together to rid ourselves of this invader by cutting it off at ground level.

BOUQUET To the people spreading false COVID-19 information. Thanks for letting me know that just five minutes’ reading on social media will make me more knowledgeable than medical professionals and scientists who’ve studied and worked for many years. Now I can quit medical school.

BEEF To Nanaimo city council for looking for ways to turn Nanaimo into a trailer park. Please make sure to use your neighbourhoods as a testing ground. Why have bylaws anyways?

BOUQUET Appreciation to the nurses and doctors in Nanaimo’s emergency room and especially those on the fifth floor during my recent stay in NRGH following a stroke. Their care, attentiveness and compassion was beyond measure. Top-notch care.

BEEF To the city for planting grass on medians. It looks great until the workers are using a weed wacker and rocks go flying. This time one hit my windshield. Please consider just putting rocks down, less maintenance the city taxpayers have to shell out.

BOUQUET I was at the Nanaimo Regional General Hospital recently for day surgery. Thank you so much for the loving care that I received from the staff: admissions, nurses, surgeon and anesthetist.

BEEF To the farm in the city. Get control of your loud, intrusive peacocks. They’ve been seen on people’s rooftops and wander into our backyard and block driveways. Next step is blasting them with the hose and calling animal control.

BOUQUET To Shoppers Drug Mart in University Village. You guys are always so busy but remain helpful and professional. Thank you to Melissa who is always happy to answer my questions regarding my prescription and submitting claims. You have made my diagnosis of gestational diabetes a bit easier and I thank all of you for that.

BEEF To people literally using the word ‘literally’ literally all the time. It literally gets on my literal nerves to literally hear ‘literally’ so literally overused.

BOUQUET To Jennifer at Country Club Save-On-Foods. When I got to the till I realized I didn’t have a wallet. Jennifer put my things in the cooler at customer service until I was off work and able to go back. Her vibe made me smile and I really appreciated it.

BEEF To the person complaining about Dr. Henry not allowing churches to open, and comparing us to other provinces with higher COVID counts allowing church attendance. Do you not see the connection between looser regulations and higher COVID counts?

BOUQUET To the person beefing about losing a doctor, there are nurse practitioners in Chase River.

BEEF I am not your average complainer. The patchwork road repairs carried out recently after pipework repairs/upgrades at the top of Rutherford Road are a disgrace. What happened to pride in workmanship?

BOUQUET To Chris and Dr. Myriam at Mahalo Veterinary Hospital. Our puppy had an ear infection that had taken a turn for the worse. They met me at the hospital to help our sick puppy even though they were in the middle of watching the Montreal-versus-Toronto NHL playoff game. Their care and helpfulness to get our puppy back on the right track was amazing. You truly are heroes of pets and their owners. Also they missed the overtime goal!

BEEF To all the entitled parents and adults who stop in the middle of McGirr Road to drop off their students. This is not a drop-off zone. It is a road. There is a three-lane drop-off zone in the parking lot. You are not that special.

BOUQUET Thank you to Mike and his team at Midas Auto Service. I’m so grateful for how thorough and considerate they were when working on my oil change. Cheers.

BEEF To our city council and their extravagant spending habits. The latest boondoggle: $3 million for a proposed boathouse at Loudon Park.

BOUQUET To the drive-thru staff at Starbucks Metral. Your smiling, friendly demeanour and awesome greetings on the side of my cup make my day every time.

BEEF To the medical clinic for dropping me after 10 years as a patient without notice. Like the other similar beefs, I’m 66, in need of a doctor, unable to find one anywhere, and given the current virus problems, am unable to visit a walk-in. So much for enjoying my retirement here.

BOUQUET To the owner of the old red Nissan pickup that has finally been moved off the side of Hammond Bay Road.

BOUQUET To the staff at Seafield Surgical Centre, it was a pleasure being part of your team. What a great job you have all done over the years for this community. Keep up the good work.

BEEF To the driver of the black C7 who passed me on the Malahat at about triple the speed limit. Why should my family out for a drive take a chance of getting harmed by your driving?

BOUQUET Thank you to the transit supervisor who stopped at the bus stop I was waiting at and gave me a ride to work. Apparently there was a problem with the No. 8 bus to Cedar and this awesome human drove the route and told everyone waiting for the bus that he would be back to drive them to their destination. I cannot think of another city where this kind of thing would happen.

BEEF To the city. Metral is now so attractive and bike/pedestrian friendly – unless two trucks try to go past each other at which time it’s like threading a needle with a five-ton thread. It’s obvious councillors don’t realize there are bigger vehicles that can’t handle goat paths for roads.

BOUQUET To my parents for doing so much more than I ever thank them for.

BEEF To the city for spending wildly on attracting business to downtown when literally no one I know in the north end wants to venture down there without an armed escort. Please stop burning taxpayer money in vain attempts to get businesses to relocate there.

BOUQUET To the gentleman in downtown who wanted to buy the kids and ladies lunch as we were out on our daycare walk. Thank you, your generosity made our day.

BEEF To the supermarket selling wipes floating in alcohol in tubs with a thin, cheap screw on cap that lets the contents pour out if it falls over. My car is now doused in isopropyl.

BOUQUET To every staff member at the Beban Park vaccine site. We were very nervous about the vaccine, but oh my goodness, what a pleasant experience. From the greeter, to the the authorization staff, to the guides and the immunizers and the aides. I cannot say enough good things. Very welcoming, helpful and caring. Every question answered. Every doubt was thrown out the door. Thank you.

BEEF Thousands of Nanaimo homes leave garbage bins outside and unsecured. How many have received the $230 fine threatened? Or is this just another toothless regulation?

BOUQUET My husband and I went to Pipers Lagoon to enjoy another beautiful day. Well, lo and behold, as the name of the beach implies, there was a man playing the bagpipes up on the hill at the far end of the beach. It was beautiful to hear, and we wanted to thank the gentleman for sharing his talent with everyone.

BEEF To the guy who said I was the type to take on road trips and not build a life with. Karma is coming for you buddy.

BOUQUET To me. For decades, I’ve generously provided delightful mom and dad jokes to my family. Free of charge. No bouquets to them, though. They just roll their eyes at my fine talent. I am hilarious.

BEEF To the person or persons who speed up and down Pythian Lane. There are children who play in this lane. Quit trying to break the land speed record.

BOUQUET To Nanaimo traffic calming department for great job they are doing on Lost Lake Road and Burma Road. As a frequent traveller on this road I am impressed with the job that they have done. If the proper speed limit is observed this is a lot safer road both for drivers and pedestrians.

BEEF To the business for not lowering its Canadian flag to half-mast. A conscious decision. Our first step to reconciliation is acknowledgement; the visual statement could have been so impactful.

BOUQUET Thank you so much for finding a paper carrier for the Waterbury neighbourhood. We missed the paper for a long time. What a nice surprise to find a familiar newspaper at my front door. It is a part of my routine to read the paper with a cup of coffee. Thank you for distributing such a good newspaper.

BEEF To all the ‘water conservation’ consultation. Stop development and the problem is solved. And beef to the regional district for once again hiring consultants to do their job. What in the blazes do we pay government for?

BOUQUET I placed my order for a couple of subs from Subway, I had pressed the back button a couple of times and somehow ended up on the wrong Subway location. I phoned the south-end Subway and explained that. The gentleman I talked to told me he would deliver them as he was going to their two other Subway locations in the north end. I was blown away by the offer, and he did deliver them for me. Wow.

BEEF To DFO for denying a Canadian citizen the right to harvest our natural resource, ignoring science. Where’s the accountability?

BOUQUET To parents who teach their young children to respectfully observe wildlife from a distance. Running after and screaming at young wildlife does more harm than you are aware of. Kindness to helpless creatures reaps huge rewards in later life. We all know what happens when the opposite occurs.

BEEF To the railway, they pull ties and leave them at the side of the railway instead of disposing of them properly. Our first responders have better things to do than come put out fires in the park on a daily basis, what a waste of resources. They should become a nuisance property with the amount of calls. Why should taxpayers be paying?

BOUQUET To all the friends and family who supported me through my life and writing journey. You mean the world to me. Thank you for entering the rabbit hole of my book Intrabit to see the one world through my still healing life’s eyes. Thank you for being my light, I will always be yours, if you want me to be.

BEEF To the few residents of Opal Road who now, after losing the battle of the traffic pattern change, find it necessary to park their vehicles along the street to try to force a single-lane situation. Hopefully these individuals will be fined for their disregard for public safety and this foolishness will cease.

To submit a beef or a bouquet to the Nanaimo News Bulletin, e-mail editor@nanaimobulletin.com.

Beefs and bouquets